3 Fingers Mega Win

Well, I know what I am
Rock and roll-in's a scream, makin' millions my dream
Well, I do that a lot
I'll just give it a try, won't let good times pass me by
They're all I've got

NP 1974

By the time many of you will read this I will have already disappeared with my MEGA millions. After I give the thieving bastards in Indy and DC their cut, and place the winnings in an annuity getting around 3% interest, I will have close to $30,000 a day for the rest of my life, and that doesn't even touch the principal. So long suckers, I'm out!   

A bit harsh yes, but its fun thinking of all the ways you could spend that money.  Without a doubt your entire life would change and it would absolutely have to, and maybe not even for the best (haaa who am I kidding, I will shit on a golden throne!)

Like many of us, I spent way too much time today trying to figure out exactly how life would change, and more importantly the exact steps I would have to take even before I collected and started spending. Since I will be winning, this is how its going down. (Special thanks to David Lee Roth for the one idea).

10:01 - Bgirl tripped on the stairs as Mrs. Anub screamed to get a towel to wipe up the pee puddle left on floor as the numbers on the TV match the ticket!

10:03 - after a minute of silence, we rewind the TV to verify the numbers.  Car keys are grabbed. Before I go, Mrs. Anub and I have a knowing glance of "look both of us just got extremely good looking, so should we just split it now and move on or...."

10:45 - hands shaking, pull into Meijer parking lot.

10:52 - look at poor snaggle toothed cashier as I pay for a safe.

11:18 - placed signed ticket (after making multiple copies) into safe.

11:22 - Make the only call I would make, and the only person outside of Mrs. Anub who will know until the press conference.  Buy said trustee a plane ticket to Chicago for the morning, hire a limo to pick him up and immediately start a plan on how to protect and manage the money from day 1. Suffice it to say he and his family will never have to work again.

11:24-  7:00AM - sit and stare at safe and become extremely paranoid. Scream and slap at anyone who even breathes around the safe.  Start an immediate inventory of which police officer and lawyer I could trust. Find out how to how to hire an armored vehicle for the drive to Indy to collect.

So besides the obvious, pay off all blood relatives debt,set up trust funds for kids, buy into a gated community, golf membership, private travel, house in London, vacation home in Portugal, lots of charity...

What the heck could you spend all that money on?  Since I already won, considered these as done!

1. Launch 3 Fingers and Nub foundation (The Human Fund) for the fingerly challenged.

2. Hire a personal organ donor.  He will be paid handsomely to be super healthy, and when I am     ready he must donate his liver and kidney to me. 

3. Buy a seat on the rope line on every hole on the back nine at Augusta for life.

4. Private 40th bday party, with Canadian musical entertainment.

5. Hire Brian Cranston to hang out with me dressed exclusively as Heisenberg.

That will get me started.  What say you faithful readers?  How will you spend it?

Seriously you would have to be the dumbest person alive to blow that kind of cash.  If you are smart, and not an Ed Hardy tee shirt wearing douche you should set up your family for generations to come.  

So love to all, but after I win tonight I will never talk to any of you again!

Good night and good luck, 

3 Fingers

Gassy Bells

Sadder still to watch it die
Than never to have known it
For you - the blind who once could see -
The bell tolls for thee...

NP - 1982

I promised that this blog would put random to shame.  So here it is, a quicky about my life as the mad English Handbell afficianado!  That's right this guy not only likes handbell music, I have played off an on for 33 years.  In fact in High School, I was part of a handbell legacy. 

 So how does a 3 fingered person play bells?

 

 With a 3 fingered glove of course!

 

I have watched 2 basketball games all year Valpo - Butler, and Valpo-Detroit.  So these Final 4 picks are golden!

North Carolina, Missouri, Wichita State, Ohio State.... BOOK IT!



I said in my very first post I would not be too political... but I am sick and effing tired of politicians being blamed for high gas prices.  Please child, politicians know one thing, how to get elected!

Vote Anub 2012!

Again, I am not taking a side, I am just don't blame a politician for gas prices

We all hate the sticker shock of $75 -$100 to fill up so you and little Johnny can get to soccer practice.  But I swear the Repub's have distributed the memo to ensure that every conservative talk show host focuses on gas prices being Obama's fault. I swear I paid over $4 when Bush was in office, but I am sure that I must be dreaming. 

Two words for you:  OIL SPECULATION.  Politicians are not smart enough to speculate.  Don't know who Koch is... figure it out...  and wonder why the Repubs are blaming Obama. 

Loyal Reader JR sent this in:
 From  http://thinkprogress.org/economy/2011/04/13/153206/koch-industries-price-gouging/?mobile=nc
 
However, market fundamentals are not driving the nearly $4.00/gallon gas prices. In fact, under the Obama administration, oil production is at record highs and there is adequate global supply of crude. As Commodity Futures Trading Commission (CFTC) commissioner Bart Chilton has explained, rampant oil speculation, which is at its highest level on record right now, is to blame for current prices. 

As a recent Center for Public Integrity report uncovered, Koch lobbied aggressively against Obama’s financial reform bill, particularly on provisions related to transparency in the energy trading market. Is Koch again buying up supply in expectation of higher crude prices during the summer or beyond — as many analysts have predicted? No one knows, especially when the energy speculation and trading industry currently operates with virtually no regulation.

They gamble, they win, you lose. 


Best wishes of health to my German Project Manager,

Good day, and go pump some gas.

3 Fingers

My favorite email

I get so angry, but I keep my mouth shut
And turn it up!

NP-1993

I found this wonderful email smack down of what seems to be a rogue media vendor.  I don't know the companies involved, but I am proud of whoever wrote this.   All names and certain items are edited to protect the innocent.  

This is the definitive of how you smack down a vendor:

Guy with extremely bad reputation,

It amazes me that you and presumably your attorney would put in so much time getting approval from  huge national company that has more lawyers per square inch then Holland, Mi has churches on this usage of their name and not consider that it might be helpful to at some point have confirmation of that approval in writing.  Unfortunately, your actions over the past couple months have proven to me that I cannot trust you at your word.  I do not intend to contact your attorney, and I will not tell you again that his opinions hold no value to anyone. It is not your company that is responding to constant complaints regarding this shady advertising method,  it is not you who are dealing with consumers upset that your shady advertising method is nowhere close to the value of the incentive being given, and it is not your company dealing with guys who have just love to bury you in legal paperwork.  Until you start taking real responsibility for what you encourage to put in these shady advertising methods, I have no interest in these "discussions" with you beyond your sending me a proof, my marking it up, you sending a final draft to me for approval and my being able to see EVERY version of your shady advertising method that you send out on behalf of one said company from now until you are no longer doing business with anyone.

A few things that are specifically on my mind at this moment:

1) I do not appreciate the fact that yesterday you submitted a sample for review which is nowhere near the compliant sample we worked to develop.  You are wasting my time by continuing to use shady advertising methods that don't even meet the minimum disclosure standards and if I have to continue making the same changes to these shady advertising methods I will recommend to our executive staff that another stop it or or my mom will shoot notices goes out immediately. 

2) If I EVER see another shady advertisement method that states a value higher than what you would pay for a nice dinner with your sweety, said company will hold you personally responsible for any complaints we receive from the consumer.  I suggest you get your staff working on this change immediately for the shady advertising methods you will no doubt be putting out next Monday.  If said company wants you to put something higher than the value of a nice dinner with your sweety, then you can direct them to me and tell them to have all other details ready before they call. 

3) In our meeting, we specifically addressed the fact that the said company is not the enemy and that we are doing what we have to do to protect the businesses of said company while at the same time working our tails off to ensure we remain profitable.  Do not paint me as a "hero" for approving a shady advertising piece that does not pass our legal standards, while subtly suggesting that I am a villain if I make any changes to it.  I will consider myself a hero when said company no longer feel the need to use a shady advertising method. 

4) Also at our meeting, we made two requests of you - one to provide an excel spreadsheet, with several columns of information regarding said company using your service and the other to let me see every shady advertising method starting now.  You have done neither.  You copied and pasted some information in to an e-mail regarding said company, but it is incomplete and does us little good since it is in this format and you provided a weak excuse for why you couldn't let me see every shady advertising method that went out.  If we do not receive the requested spreadsheet by the end of this week and I do not have access to every shady advertising method that goes out next week, you can consider your business with said company over permanently. 

Your reputation precedes you, guy with incredibly bad reputation.  We have educated ourselves on your background, on the complaints flying around the internet regarding the shady advertising method you so proudly use (with a disclaimer to your client that you have no responsibility for what is on them), and on your own legal history as well as that of some of your clients.  Said company prides itself on working with "best-in-class" partners in every aspect of our business.  You are not living up to that standard and we question whether you have the ability to change.  Prove us wrong. 

Respectfully,

My hero

Good work faceless internet hero, and good day,

3 Fingers